Wild Nordics

Where Passion & Survival Converge

8 Tips to NOT suck at Dating

By on 19/02/2017

Have you ever wondered why some people are more successful at dating while others remain clueless on how to succeed?

While good looks may help it is also as much a skill that can be learned as what you were born with.  Below are 8 tips that improve your chances and make you more attractive to the opposite sex.

1. Have some direction in your life

There is nothing worse than talking to someone who has no direction in their life. While all of us may still be figuring out the details its pretty easy to have some sort of an idea.

Something like: “I want to work with people. I am applying to university and will do some general humanity courses to see what I fancy” or “I really like numbers. I am studying mathematics and might try to get a job with NASA”.

What you say will not be set in stone and you can change your mind but it shows that you aren’t sitting still and are doing something with your life. Even if you are at home you with kids you can still be working towards a target.

2. Show Confidence even if you are not

Confident people have good posture. They look up, walk with their shoulders back and engage people with meaningful eye contact. Confident people resonate positive energy, are decisive and don’t hide their hands. They smile and look relaxed and in charge of the situation.

Confidence is like a muscle, you have to build it up through developing self esteem and building on your achievements. Continuous practice in social situations and public speaking help to build and personal presentation.

3. Be Passionate about something

Passion is contagious and people that have it are more interesting. Even geeky stuff like collecting stamps can have a positive impact. Having a deep knowledge of the area you are passionate about makes you appear smart and engaging. Don’t get too stuck on the subject but be excited when you talk about it.

Don’t forget to take the opportunity to ask about the other person’s passions as well. They will like it and it’s a good way to get to know them better.

4. Ask good questions

Good questions are not only important to keeping a conversation going, they show you are interested in the other person. In the beginning of a conversation provocative and challenging questions are effective way to put someone on the spot and having them qualify themselves. This shows confidence and high value and usually goes down well if delivered with a little humor and a smile. Just be careful of any sore spots so as not offend.

Later in the conversation ask more questions that promote discussion. Find the topics the other person likes to talk and drill down into more detail. Remember to pay attention to the answers and try to add something intelligent about the topics.

5. Be Genuine

Being humorous, sarcastic or using excessive banter can be fun in the beginning of a conversation but it is important that the people you talk to see a little bit the serious side of you.Showing vulnerability is a way to take the conversation to a more personal level and build a relationship of trust. There is no need to spill all the candy on the table but showing that there is a deeper softer side of you that they could get to know opens a door of interest.

As well as sharing something personal its important to always be your best self. Trying to be something that you are not comes through and can be fake and unattractive.

6. Stand for something

Principles and convictions are sexy. They show that a person has backbone. Its also usually a good way to find common ground. Honesty, integrity and equality are  generally all commonly shared. Causes are also a good topic unite around. Saving a forest, protecting endangered animals or fighting for civil liberties. Its always good to also explain why you believe what you do.

7. Show your Feminine/Masculine side

For men there is nothing more elegant than a lady. Dress and carry yourself in a feminine way. Be gentle and nurturing but slightly allusive. Make a man work a little hard to win you over but don’t make it impossible or he will lose interest.

As a man show the woman chivalry and respect. Display leadership and decisiveness but not overbearance. Make her feel special and admired once she has won your respect but make her work a little to keep you keen.

8. Take proper care of yourself

It doesn’t take a lot of effort to be well groomed and look nice. A haircut, some nice clothes and a splash of fragrance can make a lot of difference. Taking care of ones body should be a daily task. Exercise and eating well are mandatory components.